My First Month Failure

One month into the new school year.  Outreach is still in full swing.  The multiple events that were held are over, and now it's time to start building up these students. Let's get them into Bible studies and let's start filling them up with the love of Christ.  Great!  I had my first study last week and I was beyond excited.  I was finally getting to the part of my mission that I'm good at...the teaching aspect.  I was finally going to be able to take 5 guys under my wing and lead them to Christ.  Then Wednesday came and only one guy showed up...

WHY?

Here is why only one of my contacts came.  I wasn't being relational.  Out of the 25 names on my list, I had only met a couple of them, and even when I was contacting them, it wasn't to hang out or go play basketball or grab lunch.  I was making the calls and without ever really knowing these guys, I was already inviting them into study.  I was going straight to the BUILD stage without ever winning them over.  I was assuming that the students had already been won over by a game of ultimate frisbee or life-size Mario Kart (yeah that actually happened), but they weren't.  Those events were just the first steps.  The winning process takes time and is vital to any ministry.

THE KEY POINT

I don't know about girls, but with guys trust is a huge thing.  In a Bible study, the men are asked to open up and share their thoughts and ideas on not only a particular subject within scripture, but are also asked to open up about their own lives, their own shortcomings and failures, and that can be really tough for guys.  We have this idea that we have to be closed up and can't let our true feelings show in order to be manly, but that is just the opposite. We have to be willing to open up to our fellow men if we ever want to become the men God wants us to be.  However, that isn't something that just happens immediately.  Like I said, it's tough for guys to do that.  So what do we do?  We must be relational with these men.  Hang out with them.  If a guy wants to be a gym rat and work out all day, go do it.  If you have a guy that loves music and just wants to chill in the dorm listening to Kayne (or whatever kids listen to these days) do it!  It may not be something you enjoy doing, but that is how you build that trust. And it is no overnight process.  It will take time and a ton of patience, but for your ministry to be the most fruitful, patience is needed to gain that trust.

I learned this the hard way this year.  I tried to cut some corners and go to the build without the win.  It didn't work.  And to be real honest, I'm not surprised.  I know that I wouldn't go to a study with someone I didn't know, let alone somebody I've never even met. So, if you can learn something from my failure in the first month of the year, it's this: be relational.  The WIN is just as key as the build in the sense that if you don't win a particular student over, you won't get the chance to build him/her up.  Take time getting to know these students inside and out before you try and fill them with Jesus.  It can be uncomfortable and awkward, but isn't eternity worth the awkwardness?

In Christ,

Josh